I saw a job on Indeed.com for a Specimen Collector at Aloha Toxicology in Honolulu, Hawaii. Here is my cover letter:
Hello.
Let me start by simply stating I’d be awesome at collecting urine specimens. I can’t say I’ve ever been paid as a professional to watch while men urinate, but on an amateur level I’m told my performance was passable. And I once reported a crack addict for urinating on the hood of my car. I was not in my car at the time, my car was in my driveway at the time, and I saw it happening through my kitchen window. So my point is that Continue reading »